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About Babyís Separation Anxiety

How do I feel about my childís separation anxiety? Honestly, itís absolutely one of the most delightful feelings I really enjoy as a mom. I remember when my son was between 8-9 months old. Just like every mother, I couldnít forget those moments. At that time, he often asked for more attention from me rather than from anybody in the house. No matter where he was or who was holding him, as soon as he saw me, he suddenly cried as if he was asking me to hold him. When I came close to him, he abruptly opened his arms and looked so happy.

His cry stopped in a moment. It was truly an unspoken feeling I had experienced. But there was also time when he acted differently from what I had expected. When I went for work, I thought he would cry hard to see me leaving him. I hugged him tight and kissed his face again and again.

I told him, ďBaby, Mommy have to go to work now. Eat and drink a lot, okay? And have a good nap. Iíll be back. Love you much. Bubye.Ē Sometimes he kept looking at me when I said so. I expected him to start weeping. But it didnít happen. I wondered why. I found out later that he was interested with the wheels of the car I traveled in everyday.

Whenever the car started to run, my son always kept his eyes on the wheels. Looking at them spinning must have been very exciting to him. I just smiled, though my heart broke a little. I soothed myself by thinking that it was good for him being curious of strange things. My son is a baby who has sleeping problem. Throughout the night during his sleep, he often woke up several times. If he woke up and didnít find me nearby, he would cry out loud, making the whole house panic as if something really bad happen. When I got into the bedroom, he would crawl toward me, and then I hugged him. Heíd be calm afterward. Breastfeeding really worked to put him back to sleep.

Thank God I decided to breastfeed him so that I wouldnít be engaged with the rush of preparing formula during the night. Yes, I chose to breastfeed him in nighttimes, even though he still got formula in day times. Maybe this breastfeeding activity had created the bond between us. I enjoyed it, and still until now. This might also what made my son didnít want to stay away from me. If your baby or child has the same characteristic as my son has, Iím sure you have the same feeling as I do. If you think that your babyís cry (for being away from you) annoy you, just remember that it wonít last forever. Separation anxiety is a phase in your childís development during his early years of life. Almost all children go through this experience. What I can suggest you is just enjoy these intimate moments before theyíre gone along with your childís growth.

From what Iíve heard from my friends about this, youíre gonna miss the moments. To me, even now, I really donít want the phase fade away. Wait, wait. Thereís one more thing Iíd like to share with you, which you may not think will make your child comfortable. I remember my friend told me that if youíre going somewhere, donít forget to tell your child that youíll be back. Instead of sneaking out of the house, waving your hand and saying that youíll be back will soothe him somehow.


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Career Coaching Leadership Boundaries
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